I just want to say that I’m pretty proud if myself for making it this far through all the obstacles I’ve encountered with the complete lack of support I’ve had. So proud of myself. I shouldn’t be so darn down all the time.
Just realized someone I considered a good friend from freshman year of college deleted me off facebook? We didn’t really keep in touch since there was so much bullshit with my old roommate and everyone was awkward… but what the hell? I don’t understand why I got the delete button.
I’m not the horrible person they all made me out to be.
I just watched Marie Antoinette again at work. This song is from after she has an affair with Count Fersen and walks along the grassy pasture to the palace. It’s so beautiful… simple… so reflective. I feel it. I can almost understand it. My heart aches when I hear it.
Quite happy, I must say! My dirty little package came in the mail today :3 Yay for single, lonely girl fun!
Going to that viewing was very hard. Joe (his son who went with me to England and school since 7th grade) was always a gentleman and always a man… but he really stepped it up. He’s the man of the house now. He was consoling his mother who could barely stand and checking on his little brothers, running back and forth to shake hands, get new tissues… my heart just breaks for this family of five kids. Joe’s uncle talked about how there was going to be a place setting missing from Thanksgiving dinner and how those five kids won’t have a dad around anymore… and it just broke my heart. They’re the nicest family… I don’t know any nicer people… I threw my arms around Joe’s neck and told him that I was so so sorry and that if he needed anything I was there. I’ve never been squeezed so tight. It was so good to see him… but I wish they weren’t under those circumstances. My heart just breaks. It was so hard.
I’m laying naked in bed and I’m so comfy. But I can’t breathe out of my nose and kinda have to pee. Today is my brother Kurt’s 35th birthday. Normally I’d see him and we’d cook a big dinner :( my English exboyfriend commented on his wall saying happy bday… I was surprised because Kurt didn’t really want to have much to do with him while he was here. Matt’s a sweetheart. 12 more weeks til I see him :) the end Bahahah